Shadow in the Cloud – WTF?!

WTF, but not in a good way! After a friend told me it’s already the worst movie he saw this year, I was hooked on getting more insight about it. I’m a sucker for WW2 aviation. Throw in some supernatural aviation folklore and I’m all eyes and ears.

Whilst surfing YouTube for reviews and reactions, I stumbled across the actual movie! Yeah, someone managed to upload it. So there I was, at 5 in the morning hitting play on this movie my best friend said it’s the absolute worst, while some YouTubers who normally wouldn’t refrain from taking the piss at poorly done movies were conjuring all sorts of positives. A clash of ideas, excellent!

Not gonna lie, the first 50 minutes of the movie can hold it’s own. But ya gotta accept that airmen were rapey douchebags who cluttered the radio with sexist and borderline rapist chatter. You see, there’s this airwoman that got on a board and she’s carrying a secret transport and the crew is more than reluctant to take her on, but they eventually do because of the signed orders she shows them. She then leaves her important bag with the least rapey aviator and goes down in the machine gun turret for the flight. Fast forward, a motherfuckin’ gremlin appears – she’s the first one to see it as the creature is tearing up the wing of the bomber. Of course, the crew think she’s nuts and being hysterical because SHE’S A WOMAN! Cue in some Japanese fighters that locate the bomber while the gremlin makes its way on board the bomber and steals the secret bag and then hangs it outside on the torn wing.

By this point we’ve discovered the secret in the bag is the woman’s baby. And this is the 50-minute mark when all that claustrophobic build-up is thrown down the gutter. By simply saying „you have no idea how far I’m willing the go”, the main character suspends reason, logic and the laws of physics and aviation in the attempt to get her baby back.

Up until then you see the movie locked in the machine gun turret with her as she communicates with the men only through radio. As I said, despite the moronic dialogue, I was hooked on the setting. But then the moviemakers took a giant step towards FuckAllVille and made this lady virtually unhurtable. If you fall out of a bomber and are slingshot back into it by the shockwave of a fighter plane exploding undearneath you, perhaps you will understand if I begin carrying less and less about the character. I was pissed as I kept watching, and only the fact that it was close to 6 AM kept me from not screaming at the screen. I would have been equally pissed if it were a man instead of a woman doing all those ludicrous endeavours. It was just poor movie making. And I love nonsense scenes, which is what made me even more irate. If the movie would have been set from the beginning as this fuck all logic World War 2 adventure, it would have made sense. Instead, it takes itself very seriously in the first 50 minutes, including the supernatural element, then takes this bizarre shift.

This could have something beautiful.

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